Okay by now, if you have looked at part 1 or part 2, you should be beginning to work out that in real life I am actually a bit of an arse.
Not a bad person, you understand, just a bit prone to being a bit of an arse.
I was in Cambridge the other day, and of course I had to get a taxi to the station when it came time to going home, because of how stupidly uncooperative the City Planners are in that place.
Having paid, I got out and headed into the station. At the turnstiles I realised that I was missing something. My Annual train pass.
It contained my usual train ticket, as well as the specific ticket to Cambridge for that day. And the main place where it wasn’t was in my pocket.
I did some speedy detective work and realised it must have fallen out of my pocket when I pulled out my wallet to pay the taxi. I turned and looked but the car was long gone. I had to work fast.
I got straight onto the taxi company and told the lady what had happened and asked if the taxi could turn around. “I’ll ask him to have a look” came the reply. Now, I’m not being funny but if a cab driver gets a buzz over the radio saying some idiot has left their pass in his car, just how thoroughly do you think he will look? Do you, like me, suspect he won’t even get out of the driving seat?
So I waited.
When I called back it was to be told that she had contacted the driver, he had looked and the pass was not there. All I did next was ask if he could possibly come back so I could look myself. Seriously, at no point did I think this guy was trying to steal the pass or that he was lying, I just didn’t trust that he had looked properly for it. I knew it would be on his floor.
The lady went berserk. What was I accusing her driver of? If I felt he was a thief why didn’t I go to the police? No No No. That’s absolutely not what I was saying at all. I just knew he wouldn’t have searched his car thoroughly – that’s all.
We argued at length. I may, at some point, have told her what I thought of her attitude. She may, at some point, have offered to call the police herself.
Meanwhile, because I was on a mobile, I walked around in circles.
When I disconnected the call I must have been standing almost exactly where I had got out of the car because right there on the floor in front of me…
Quietly, I picked up my pass and made my way through to a train. I think I’ll use a different taxi firm next time…